Argument, Writing, Revising

3, 062 words I have written today! Super happy about that, I must admit! However… I am only kinda following my writing schedule so far. There was a good chance it would have to adapt, and maybe that is all it is, but wrinkles were thrown into my plans despite my hopes.

To start with, last night I had an argument with my husband that left me emotionally drained. I hate feeling I have failed someone, one way or the other, and I am disappointing him AND myself. We both want kids, a better house, but it is tough to do when he is the only one bringing money in.

It was selfish of me to quit my job and start writing (which I was reminded is almost two years ago). It is a dream though, and sometimes… we answer them in less than opportune ways. That being said, we aren’t struggling financially, we’re doing fine (mostly), but we aren’t able to put money into this house to fix it up. That makes it difficult to move. It also makes it difficult to even plan on having a child. Both are goals for us and I feel like I’m not doing my part.

However this was the fire I needed under my ass. I have been avoiding working on my book, because I am afraid to fail. I am afraid it won’t go anywhere whether it is published traditional or I do it myself (tips on self publishing are welcome). I am afraid I made a super selfish decision that is hurting someone other than me for a dream that might never happen.

You can want a dream all you want, but it requires time and effort… along with some luck. I haven’t been putting in the time or effort, because pausing is easier than full steam ahead into failure.

But this argument is pushing me to get it done, because I need it to be done and out there just as much as my husband does. It may not bring in any money, but I put something I created out there and that matters, too. Right? I guess we’ll see.

Anyways, back to my writing schedule. I woke up at 4 am  which is step one. Buuuttttt…. it was to find my husband asleep in the office where I work. He has sleep apnea, doesn’t use his machine, so I felt bad waking him up. I fooled around for the next hour before he got up and I helped him get ready a lunch for work.

I didn’t feed the dogs like I should have until after, but I did eat, followed my morning routine, and played my apps on my cellphone (lame, I know). It was about 5:30am when husband left, but I didn’t feel I had time to exercise so I went right to writing and skipped the hour and a half I was supposed to read (whoops).

After that I ended up having lunch earlier than planned since my breakfast was small and I didn’t have a snack. I am at least in the section of the day where I am writing and blogging (from 10 am to noon as scheduled).

As much as I should read next, I probably won’t, because I am playing catch-up on my book which I had hoped to finish months ago. I don’t have a good excuse. I suck. I know, but I’m working on it now. That should count, right?

I initially had it written in that 1:50pm to 2:30pm would be relax with Andrew by watching an episode of something, but he has a doctor’s appointment. I’m hoping to get even more writing/editing/revising/etc done before then.

Hell, I’ll probably try to keep working while he watches whatever. That is how motivated I feel, but I know that spells burnout or an episode of hypo-mania. We’ll see how the evening plays out.

Tomorrow I am hoping to follow my writing schedule much more literally, but at least it looks like it could work for me… after some potential time management shifts.

Oh and here’s a quote to hopeful inspire, motivate, or move you to chase that dream of writing!

 

A professional writer is an amateur who didn’t quit. ~ Richard Bach

 

P.S. Seriously. I welcome any tips concerning getting published be it traditional or self. Links, input, advice. I live for it!

Drained, Disappointed, But Here

Yesterday was an off day for me. I woke up feeling drained, and with a headache (for the fourth day in a row)! I had an appointment that threw off my day, and the freezing cold we have here right now wouldn’t let me bounce back.

Our house apparently needs new seals or something, because our windows have ice on the inside around the edges, and our back door has it gathering at its base. It might just be the fact that for the past couple days its been -35 degree C, or that our house hates us. (It is a running theme of something new every couple of months creating a new problem).

Yeah, yeah, it’s winter, and I love winter, but it is kicking my ass right now or so it feels. At least I haven’t had to shovel since Monday which has been nice.

Since yesterday was a bad day, I didn’t get any writing done at all. No blog post here or editing of my book. I have another appointment today that wrecks my day, but I’m hoping to get SOMETHING done.

I usually clean my house Fridays, top to bottom and every nook and cranny, but I might wait til Andrew gets home. We’ll do it after errands (fingers crossed), but who knows?

Anyways, yesterday’s word count was zero, and Wednesday’s word count was 1,095. Today, I’m honestly hoping to get a sentence out of myself. I tried to the other day, but nothing was coming to me.

 

Forging Ahead: Alarm Clocks and My Word Count

Managed to get up at 5am again, but I will admit I hit the snooze button once. Like most people these days (I think), I use my cellphone as my alarm clock, and utilize the most annoying songs to wake up to: Meow Mix and I’m a Gummy Bear, respectively. While they wake me, they don’t force me to get up, and thus I downloaded an alarm app.

It has been… a work in progress.

It’s called Zelda Alarm (I do love The Legend of Zelda games), and I can choose songs from the various games to use. I currently use Deku Nuts Palace from Majora’s Mask, and it wakes me up even when I’m past the exhausted point. It makes me press keys to replicate the six note ocarina songs, forcing cognitive functioning right away.

My only complaint is it only seems to have two songs, and I’d love for that to change soon! But if you struggle to get up like I do, it has helped (plus putting my phone further from my immediate reach).

On to a different subject now, I was pretty tired after yesterday’s shoveling, and my word count was under half of the day before it. My word count was 551, but at least its something, right? Small steps are just as important as the big ones. Lack of sleep and winter were not my friends, and I forgive myself for it.

Today, I forge ahead despite yesterday’s failings.

I do need some advice, if any are willing to share. What are ways you take breaks from writing  (or whatever activity, chore, etc) that don’t keep you from returning to writing (or whatever activity, chore, etc)?

Usually, I find a show with short episodes, and try to just watch one which equals a 20-minute break. It’s easy to keep on point at the start, but once I get into the show, I’d rather watch it than write (sadly). I worry reading will end up the same way, too, and playing games on my phone does get me quite off track.

Part of me wants to try just walking on the treadmill for a period of time, but I think I will get bored of doing that, so I’m open to suggestions!

Winter, Writing, and Shih Tzus

Winter is my favourite season of the year! I love shoveling and snow and snowball fights!

The only thing is, where I live, we have on and off years. For example, last year was very mild and snow did not stay for long. The year prior though we got a lot of snow, schools had snow days, and it seemed every other day brought more snow.

This year has brought the snow. December was nice and mild, but January is proving itself the winteriest month ever! It holds the champion belt, for sure.

So, I have been up since 5am (which is great despite its rarity) to do one thing and that’s shovel. I did our driveway and backyard with Andrew’s help, but it didn’t end there for me. I headed to me parents’ to see that the plow had done their street and I shoveled their driveway and backyard (cause I try to be their favourite daughter, and I’m winning, clearly!).

If, at this point, you’re wondering why we shovel our backyards, it is for a simple reason. We own shih tzus who don’t like anything higher than an inch to go outside to do their business in. I also own a beagle who needs the paths to stay a bit warmer while outside (they serve as wind breaks at their current height).

After that, I went to my brother and future sister-in-law’s house to shovel their driveway, and give them a break. They both work somewhat hectic hours, and don’t have a snowblower (as far as I know). They do have a friend with a plow end on his truck who helps them though, and that’s probably the luckiest thing for them.

Once that was done, I helped a neighbour of my parents who I babysat for years ago, and then headed home for food, drink, and a relaxing shower.

Thus, the late start to my writing for the day! I wanted to get more time in, but I am sure to feel pooched sooner than later.

Yesterday’s word count was 1,362 which equaled one chapter (editing it will come later). I was hoping to write more today, but winter seems to throw snow chunks into my gears. Fingers crossed I can do it anyways!

Hopefully none of you readers have to shovel (much, if at all), and are taking an easy on this fine yet chilly Tuesday!