Time is My Enemy

Last week, I mentioned I was really excited to start editing/revising my book again. And I was. Honest.

However, I didn’t touch it. Not even once.

Instead my time was consumed by starting a freelance transcription job and a paper route. I was anxious about the flyers being delivered, and waited until they showed up on both Tuesday and Wednesday. For no real reason.

Wednesday night, I started delivering the flyers and my husband helped me after I had started. Thankfully he did, because there was no way I was getting it done on my own! As I type this, my feet still hurt and I think I did something to a nerve in my right leg ’cause it ‘shivers’ randomly.

Needless to say, I have quit the paper route.

My time needs to be focused on my book more than anything else, and it is tough to do that when I’m stressing out about other things. Plus, the route was something I wanted to do by myself, but the size of it makes that impossible which means I’d always need Andrew’s help. That isn’t fair to him.

The transcription job is a different beast. It is something I choose to do on my own time, but I wanted to see how feasible it is. Now, even with a wonky left ear (lately), I’ve managed to transcribe pretty well, and my metrics (which focus on accuracy, formatting, and commitment) are very good for the time being.

What sucks is how time consuming it is to do a short audio clip. Decent audio quality doesn’t take too long until you factor in the speakers and whether they are formulating clear sentences or not.

Still, everything I’m transcribing seems to be interesting and I’m learning in a way I did not expect. I’ll keep going at it, but…

My husband has made it pretty clear that my time should be spent on my book, and transcribing takes a second place to it. Which was super nice to hear.

Sometimes, I mess up my priorities based on what I think he wants me to be doing. I don’t want to disappoint him, but I do need to put myself and what’s best for me first from time to time.

Anyways, moral of this story is… I WILL be editing my book this week or so help me, I’m gonna lose my freakin’ mind!

Take care of yourselves, everyone!

 

Argument, Writing, Revising

3, 062 words I have written today! Super happy about that, I must admit! However… I am only kinda following my writing schedule so far. There was a good chance it would have to adapt, and maybe that is all it is, but wrinkles were thrown into my plans despite my hopes.

To start with, last night I had an argument with my husband that left me emotionally drained. I hate feeling I have failed someone, one way or the other, and I am disappointing him AND myself. We both want kids, a better house, but it is tough to do when he is the only one bringing money in.

It was selfish of me to quit my job and start writing (which I was reminded is almost two years ago). It is a dream though, and sometimes… we answer them in less than opportune ways. That being said, we aren’t struggling financially, we’re doing fine (mostly), but we aren’t able to put money into this house to fix it up. That makes it difficult to move. It also makes it difficult to even plan on having a child. Both are goals for us and I feel like I’m not doing my part.

However this was the fire I needed under my ass. I have been avoiding working on my book, because I am afraid to fail. I am afraid it won’t go anywhere whether it is published traditional or I do it myself (tips on self publishing are welcome). I am afraid I made a super selfish decision that is hurting someone other than me for a dream that might never happen.

You can want a dream all you want, but it requires time and effort… along with some luck. I haven’t been putting in the time or effort, because pausing is easier than full steam ahead into failure.

But this argument is pushing me to get it done, because I need it to be done and out there just as much as my husband does. It may not bring in any money, but I put something I created out there and that matters, too. Right? I guess we’ll see.

Anyways, back to my writing schedule. I woke up at 4 am  which is step one. Buuuttttt…. it was to find my husband asleep in the office where I work. He has sleep apnea, doesn’t use his machine, so I felt bad waking him up. I fooled around for the next hour before he got up and I helped him get ready a lunch for work.

I didn’t feed the dogs like I should have until after, but I did eat, followed my morning routine, and played my apps on my cellphone (lame, I know). It was about 5:30am when husband left, but I didn’t feel I had time to exercise so I went right to writing and skipped the hour and a half I was supposed to read (whoops).

After that I ended up having lunch earlier than planned since my breakfast was small and I didn’t have a snack. I am at least in the section of the day where I am writing and blogging (from 10 am to noon as scheduled).

As much as I should read next, I probably won’t, because I am playing catch-up on my book which I had hoped to finish months ago. I don’t have a good excuse. I suck. I know, but I’m working on it now. That should count, right?

I initially had it written in that 1:50pm to 2:30pm would be relax with Andrew by watching an episode of something, but he has a doctor’s appointment. I’m hoping to get even more writing/editing/revising/etc done before then.

Hell, I’ll probably try to keep working while he watches whatever. That is how motivated I feel, but I know that spells burnout or an episode of hypo-mania. We’ll see how the evening plays out.

Tomorrow I am hoping to follow my writing schedule much more literally, but at least it looks like it could work for me… after some potential time management shifts.

Oh and here’s a quote to hopeful inspire, motivate, or move you to chase that dream of writing!

 

A professional writer is an amateur who didn’t quit. ~ Richard Bach

 

P.S. Seriously. I welcome any tips concerning getting published be it traditional or self. Links, input, advice. I live for it!