Heaven’s Time

Chest constricts

expands

ripping my broken

heart.

I can only imagine

your suffering.

Rushed breaths

fill the quiet.

Your body bounces

with the struggle.

Your ribs rise and fall

like a dying empire.

Your heart races

against a clock

wound against you.

Your brothers wait

for you in a pain free

Heaven

and I’ll see you there

in

time.

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Dissolve

Wails rip my throat

raw with despair

My heart now shards

broken pieces

tearing

free in force

to make me feel

every

single

tear.

His cold body in my arms

It’s a reminder

of a bright light

snuffed out.

His flame flickers

weaker and weaker

gone like the wind

in an instance.

I long to hear his

heart beat like a drum

but its silence is a

deafening blow

and I dissolve into the pain

of his absence.

Cancer

I

Hate

Cancer.

Its hand creep and crawl

like warped vines.

Its touch tarnishes and taints

like nails on a chalkboard.

Vile like stomach bile,

Its hold on another one

of those I love.

Is there anything

it won’t take?

Cancer’s game is destruction.

Barbed wire around organs

constricted and stabbed

for working.

Lungs riddled with it.

Every breath a growing burn.

I yearn to ease his pain

and pray peace

finds him in sleep.

Writing With Needy Animals

My office seems to be the zone of extreme neediness in my husband and mine’s pet. Our two dogs hover around us, and the cats take turns looking for attention.

During the day, Jasper (our shih tzu) is pretty chill, choosing to sleep away the hours in peace then play with any toys. He’s been like that since he was a puppy and is now thirteen years old! My big issue with him is he has become an even grumpier asshole. He growls at the cats and the dogs for any perceived invasion of space or because they are purring. He settles down, but sometimes it takes a minute and you have to keep an eye.

Raven (our beagle) follows his lead somewhat. She’ll sleep a decent chunk, but if I talk at all, she is instantly pawing at me for some petting. She has periods of energy that are hard to burn out and she will fetch her toys, but keep away is really her game of choice.

Nyx (our tortoise coloured cat) is just a bitch if I’m honest. She swats both our dogs, and used to ‘hunt’ them, too. She caused a nice superficial cut on Raven’s ear that sent blood all over the place. Thankfully it wasn’t serious and just poorly located. Nyx is pretty much my husband’s cat so when he is home, she is with him. She runs to greet him at the door and it is quite cute and endearing.

My biggest issue when it comes to writing, or trying to, is my other cat, Hotch (he is solid black). He has a mouth on him. He constantly seems to be meowing. His food dish could be filled to the brim, and he will still sing a song of how he is starving. He meows for attention. He meows to announce his presence in the room. He rubs against my legs constantly when I am in the bathroom brushing my teeth. He rushes to the door when I let the dogs out. He loves my dogs, but it isn’t mutual for the most part.

The thing is, Hotch has no understanding of BOUNDARIES. If it weren’t for Nyx, he would spend the entire night sleeping ON me, purring. If I take a nap during the day (because I’m sick or whatever), he is ON me. In fact, I just had to move him from my keyboard and the desk. He thinks it is his nap spot. Mind you, he also sleeps where we dry our dishes and on our freezer chest.

I love all my pets, honestly, and despite the various problems they have, they are my furry, four pawed babies. I just wish there was someway to deal with them and be continually productive, y’know? Raven needs heavy duty walks which will come with warmer weather, but I have no clue how to change my cats’ behaviour to less obsessive.

Still, I managed to write 420 words so far regardless of the repeated interruptions!