doubt

Traitor

I have betrayed myself

Again.

Forsaken my goals

Again.

Keep writing, my heart whispers

Onward, evermore.

Achieve the dream of your soul

Onward, evermore.

 

Yet doubt like vines grasp my mind

Crippling will.

Holds my fingers still on the keyboard

Crippling will.

 

The light comes out another day

I will wait.

Fights my darkness from all sides

I will wait.

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Again With The Lies

Sharp little nails I sleep on at night.
Each a regret, a nightmare, a lie.
 
Toss and turn on this prickly bed.
No comfort when doubt lives.
 
I push back, I fail,
Relapse into old patterns.
 
Rebellion has yet to set me free.
Caged by painful repetition.
 
Success is a bird that soars.
Failure the chain buried in the ground.
 
Darkness tugs on tired eyes.
“Maybe tomorrow.”
 
Again with the lies.