Last night around 9pm my time, an old high school friend started a group conversation on Facebook Messenger with a couple of others that we knew from high school. It was definitely an interesting night.

In high school, I was kind of the group mom and considered a goody two shoes. I didn’t get high (never have, never will), and I wasn’t a big drinker. I helped them with school projects, gave advice, received advice. It was a couple of interesting years considering my friends were ones who enjoyed partying and getting high and dancing on the wrong side of the law (most of which I was not present for).

That said, it seems like everyone has been blown to different corners. One is currently teaching English in Korea, another is out in Alberta, another is in Halifax, and another goes back and forth from London to China from the sounds of it. Some have kids, significant others, good jobs or back in school. Most still get high and enjoy the odd party.

It is interesting to see how much and how little we have changed in that space of time. I know the instigator of the convo wants us all to get together at some time which will prove a interesting feat of organization. I’m not sure if I am good to meet up with them though.

I pretty much turfed most of those relationships at the end of high school for various reasons. I reached out to a few of them a couple years ago to apologize for that, but nothing went past that aside from one breakfast meet up.

Anyways it feels like all of them have these amazing lives or at least interesting tales surrounding their struggles. Quite a few of them did not have great home lives and are dealing with that. I just feel that my story, my time from then to now, is not as interesting. The changes in my life are more… mediocre? I guess is the word to use.

I don’t have a full time job. I put on a lot of weight from then. I don’t have a social life. I have a husband with health problems that seems serious and yet aren’t. I don’t have kids. I live in a house ready for demolition (or so it feels). I’m working on a book that I have no idea will go anywhere.

At the end of the day, I guess this online conversation reunion thingie has brought up things I wish had changed and ones I wished had not. There is nothing I can do about that now though aside from be who I want to be (not sure how well that is going to go). I can be envious of their lives or try and live my own the way I want, right?

Anyways, we will see what the future holds, as we all do in time. Take care of yourselves!